Break Me Off A Piece Of That…

Last week I acquired a large quantity of Kit Kat bars. They are SO delicious! Ironically, in the same week, I had a dentist appointment. The results of the appointment (or eating the Kit Kat bars) were two cavities. I was most definitely not the one to blame for the holes in my teeth. Logically it was Hershey’s fault! Everyone knows that sweets kill teeth. I proceeded to write the following e-mail to the wonderful people at Hershey’s.

Dear Kit Kat,
I love your candy bars! I love them so much, in fact, that they have caused me multiple cavities. I brush, oh yes, but I think I eat way too many Kit Kats to prevent cavities with the sole act of brushing. I would love to keep eating Kit Kats, however, when I average out the cost of each Kit Kat (factoring in Dentist Appointments), I am spending well over $6 per candy bar. If you are willing to compensate me for the cost of my visits to the dentist office, I can and WILL continue to support your product. Please realize that this will be a worthwhile investment, because I plan on living till AT LEAST the age of 100, and don’t plan on having teeth after age 80. At one Kit Kat per day, you will make a substantial profit from your investment.
Regards,
Nate

I have been awaiting the response for the last few days. I received it today… I hope you all enjoy it.

Thank you for contacting The Hershey Company.

A great deal of care is used in our manufacturing and packing processes to make sure that consumers receive quality products. In 1978, a research team at MIT and the Forsyth Dental Center at Boston found the cavity-inducing potential of sugar, when combined with chocolate under experimental conditions, was greatly reduced. In these studies, researchers isolated a heat-resistant, water soluble component from the chocolate. Subsequently, this component was found to block the activity of an enzyme that promotes the development of tooth decay. Scientists also recognize that the cocoa butter present in milk chocolate helps in clearing foods quickly from the mouth. The information you provided was reported to our Quality Assurance Department.

We appreciate your loyalty as a customer.

I have decided that instead of brushing my teeth, I will just eat a Kit Kat bar in the morning and evening and rub cocoa butter on my teeth after lunch. That ought to do take care of those nasty cavities to come! This just goes to show that in all reality, life is a joke!

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You’re Killing Me! »« Meiko