So Funny I’m Nauseous

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything worth laughing at.  Hopefully this post will prove, however, that my life has not been lacking in the humor department.  I recently had the opportunity to go to dinner with my buddy Nate and his girlfriend Megan.  We had a riot of a time.  At first I thought it would be a lame night.  I had the feeling that I would be sitting with them all evening being disgusted while watching them flirt with one another as the third wheel.  I had forgotten that Nate and Megan are cool, and therefore would not neglect me (I also have a knack for making myself ‘un-neglectable.’)   We made our way over to a local Mexican restaurant to nourish and strengthen our bodies.  Throughout our visit together we shared alot of laughs.  I’ve noticed that for some reason things are just funnier when you are around good friends.  I, in particular, was on a roll that night.  I don’t know what it was, but even I thought I was funny. After gorging ourselves, we made our way back to Nate’s apartment where the highlight of the night took place.  We sat on the couches (because our bodies were incapable of doing anything else) and just talked.  Somehow I got Megan laughing yet again.  I had her going so hard that she started moaning about her stomach hurting.  Of course this just fed fuel to the flames.  I spouted out some off the wall quote I’d heard from my mother about birth.  She says that, “giving birth is like pooping a pumpkin.”  That did it.  Megan stood up and ran holding her stomach to the bathroom.  Nate and I could hear her through the wall hacking and breathing hard.  Don’t worry, she didn’t throw up… she just came very very close.  Neeldess to say, I was a proud man.  I felt terrible in that moment, yet there was a slight twinge of satisfaction and pride.  I have made people shoot milk and other assorted beverages out their noses.  I have probably even made some pee in their pants a little bit, but never in my wildest dreams did I EVER think that I would make someone laugh so hard that they would become nauseous.  I am a funny funny man.

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